What’s wrong with sex?
As soon as we start talking about “sexual immorality” we start getting guilt feelings. Either we feel guilty about sexual matters we’ve been involved in or what we’ve thought about that we wish no one to know. It’s a touchy subject, even though televisions, movies, magazines and even comic books bombard us with sex every chance they get. Publicly, we seem to be able to speak about sex at will, but in one-on-one conversation, we seem to have a difficult time talking about it, even with someone we are having sex with!
So what is the matter with us? Is there something wrong with sex? No, absolutely not. Sex was created by God, and he wants us to have sex. However, sex is also a private issue, in that a couple’s sexual practice shouldn’t really be discussed in public. Also, we recognize that sex is an action that is easy for us to misstep. Almost all of us have had sexual experiences that have been wrong—sin for us, possibly harming another, or we have been shamed about our sexual actions.
And there are so many ways to go wrong with sex. Our society obsesses about it, yet doesn’t want to talk openly and fairly about what is right and wrong with it. Jesus, of course, had no such limits. He spoke clearly and openly about what is right and wrong with sex.
You’ve heard the teaching, “Just don’t commit adultery.” But I say to you that if you even look at the opposite sex with desire to possess, then you have already intended to commit sexual immorality, and so you will be judged by God.
What is adultery?
Adultery is used specifically to talk about sexual involvement when one of the parties is already married to another person. It is cheating on your spouse or being involved with a married person. However, in Scripture, the term “sexual immorality” means more than just adultery. It includes incest, any kind of homosexual sex, bestiality, pre-marital sex and even sex with a woman who is on her monthly period. Sexual immorality not only tells us not to have sex outside of marriage, but it also tells us who God says we cannot marry.
Why is adultery so bad?
Adultery and sexual immorality are a problem because we are denying God. God created us sexually, so that we would love in a committed relationship with the opposite sex and have children. This is God’s plan, in general, for humanity’s sexuality. Surely people could reject that form of sexuality—people have almost from the beginning. But if we deny God’s plan for sexuality, then we are also rejecting a relationship with God. God considers adultery and sexual immorality to be an “abomination” a hateful practice. And God will not abide with those who so flout his desire.
Adultery and sexual immorality can sometimes hurt other people. To break a commitment because of sexual desire is a slap in the face. Sexual carelessness can destroy many lives with disease and apathy. But sexual immorality doesn’t hurt people every time. Sometimes it seems good for everyone involved. But it will always hurt your relationship with God. You become a practicer of abominations in God’s eyes. Your body is full of corruption. You could not possibly stand before God. Even your prayers become disgusting.
What is Chastity?
Jesus’ main point here has to do with the difference of enacting sexual immorality and the desire to do it. We all have some kind of sexual desires. We are all human. Jesus, in listening to the preachers of his day, heard them say, “Of course you will want her—just don’t have sex with her. But it’s okay to look, after all, we’re only human.” Jesus, however, says that any action—no matter how small—displays our action. Not only should we not have sex with the object of our desire, but even a look of desire is enough to display our sexual lust. To look with lust, or any other sexual action—flirting, masturbation, “heavy petting”—all of these display our sexual intent, even if we don’t go “all the way.” Jesus isn’t just interested in keeping our sexual organs pure—he wants us to be Chaste.
What is Chastity? It is an old-fashioned word for an idea that isn’t very popular anymore. It is keeping oneself sexually pure, not only in action, but in heart. For a single person, it is denying oneself sexually in any way. For a married person, it is keeping one’s sexual thoughts and actions on only one person—one’s spouse.
Tips To Maintain Chastity
With this discussion on sexual immorality, Jesus gives two tips to remain chaste:
If your good eye is what is encouraging you to fall from devotion to God, pluck it out and throw it away. It is to your benefit to lose even a part of your body, than for your whole body to be thrown away into hell. If your good hand is what is encouraging you to fall from devotion to God, chop it off and throw it away. It is to your benefit that you lose even a part of your body than to have your whole body thrown away into hell.
Flee Immorality
Sexual immorality is a sin, and it separates us from God. Therefore, we should stay away from anything that causes it in us. No matter what that thing is. Perhaps for one person it is pornography. Perhaps for another it is television. Perhaps for another it is dating. Perhaps for another it is the area of town where prostitutes hang out. Perhaps for another it is a relationship that always leads to sex or thinking about sex. Whatever the case, we need to maintain purity, in both body and mind. Whatever causes us to sin, Jesus recommends, we should cut it off.
Does this mean that we should be cutting off parts of our body? Perhaps even our sexual organs (God forbid!). No. Jesus says in another place that the source of our sin is not our body, but our mind (Matthew 15:18-20). But what is it that leads our mind? A picture? A place? A person? Whatever it is that leads our mind to sin, we need to be separated from it. We shouldn’t try to fight the sexual temptation—just run away from it. (I Corinthians 6:18)
Immorality is serious
The second tip Jesus gives us about remaining chaste is to remember what is the results of sexual immorality. Jesus doesn’t mince words here—sexual immorality leads to hell. If we persist in sexual immorality without repentance, then we will go to hell and our life will be an eternal death. We should remember what the consequences of our sin are, before we do it. Because afterward is too late. Once we’ve acted, we’ve acted.
We should always meditate on the eternal consequences of all that we do. If we remain chaste, we live with God. If we live in sexual immorality, we burn in hell. Let us take this word seriously. Jesus knows—he has passed through both heaven and hell and know what kind of people are in both.
Casual sex is death.
Let’s keep our minds pure.
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